DA FRENCH

One of the first enemies the United States had was the French. I once heard that the French were a people who wanted to rule the world but couldn't even rule themselves. A story comes to mind.

A U.S. Marine Corps Officer attended a conference in Europe where Admirals from the U.S., France and other NATO countries were present. This officer overheard a French Admiral commenting, "We, in France, speak many languages, as does all of Europe. Whereas, the Americans only speak one language. Why must we speak in English only at these meetings? Why can't we speak French?"

The Marine officer chimed in, "Maybe because we secured an agreement that you wouldn't have to speak German!"

The room fell silent.

Father of the Year

This week the National Father's Day Council announced the picks for their 64th annual award. This year it went to four individuals. If I told you that Donald Trump was one of them you probably wouldn't believe me. Donald Trump is a millionaire whose projects tend to fail, but he continues to prosper. I think he is married, but I am not positive about that. I know his ex-wife sued him in a very public divorce. Father of the year you say?

The National Council trumped themselves by their next pick. The Radio/TV host Larry King. He does have 6 children which is wonderful. The only problem is the fact that this man has been married 7 times.

It's apparent that the National Father's Day Council has redefined what a "good" father is. The odd thing is, the current definition, as defined by this strange council, was the definition of a "bad" father only 20 years ago. (UPISDOWN)

Larry King is Father of the Year. (UPISDOWN)

Using the council's criteria for Father of the Year, it's a good guess that ex-President Bill Clinton was Father of the Year in 1998.

The White Christian Party

Most imbecile's are placid and never amount to much. But from time to time an imbecile surfaces who is not happy with just embarrassing himself----he must embarrass the human species. Howard Dean is such an imbecile.

The newly elected chairman of the Democratic Party is not the " sharpest tool in the shed." I'm glad he is given so much exposure, it saves so much time when I explain what an American is. All I have to do is say, "You know who Howard Dean is, right? OK, that is not an American. He demonstrates not one true American quality."

On Monday, June 6, 2005, Mr. Dean energized the Democratic faithful by saying of the Republican Party, "It's pretty much a white, Christian party."

This "missing link" has a way with words. I am pressed to come up with other words I have heard lately that were so stupid and bizarre. The chairman of the Democratic Party just offended 85% of his membership. (Homer Simpson would go, "DOOH!")

If you are a Republican, you have to be giggling to yourself and shaking your head side to side. If you are a Democrat, and also a "Christian White," I am here to inform you that you are a member of the wrong Party. (DOOH!)

GEE! Does that make the Democratic Party "pretty much a black Christian Party?"

"RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! Grab the women and children.......THE CHRISTIANS ARE COMING!...THE CHRISTIANS ARE COMING!"

Guess what. Howard Dean is a white Christian. Odd? Or what.

DOOH!